Where to Meet Men
Since publishing my novel, The Guys’ Guy’s Guide to Love, I’m frequently asked by women where they should go to meet single men. In a previous post, I addressed where guys can find women, and how to approach them within their sanctums. For women, the challenge is far easier. Men are easy to find and easy to approach. So ladies, all you really need to do is think like a man and show up where the fellas like to hang out. The truth is men are everywhere and are usually thrilled when a woman initiates contact with them. But to make it even easier, I’ve broken down the ten top offline locales where guys congregate. Of course men can also be found online or through an app, but I’ll spare you Tinder or Match.com tales and focus on the old school, yet always-effective style of meeting your match organically.
So, in no particular order, here is my Guys’ Guy’s Guide For Women Looking For Guys. All you need to do to succeed is to clean up, show up, and smile and the men will be eating out of your hand. It helps to be friendly, but in most cases you won’t even have to start up a conversation. Men are almost always on the prowl.
1. Bars – Let’s face it. Most men, even if they don’t drink alcohol, like to hang out in bars with their friends. Go into any respectable bar, tavern, or beer garden after work and it will be teeming with guys letting off steam after a tough day. In New York, a great area to meet guys is downtown’s FiDi district. You’ll find lots of financial types throwing cash around after a pressure-packed day in the market.
Sports bars are always loaded with guys also. You may have to compete with the games on television, but if you know anything about sports and have a friendly way about you, you can meet men in bars any night of the week. Whisky and beer tastings and cigar bars are also great places to meet guys, unless you hate whisky, beer, and cigars. Remember, this post is about where guys hang out. No judgments and no you to change in any way. I assure you there will be more guys at the bars than in knitting class.
2. At sporting events – When guys are not watching games on TV, they are attending them. Go to any Knicks, Giants, Jets, Rangers, Nets, Yankees, Mets, or Red Bulls game and you’ll see thousands of men. Yes, they are there to watch a live game which they paid for, but guys enjoy meeting women anywhere so don’t be shy about wearing your team jersey or striking up a conversation with a guy at a game. Timing is everything so you may want to hold back on the rare occasion that the Jets are 1st-and-10 in scoring position.
3. Participating in sports – Yes, there is a trend here. Guys can be found anywhere sports are involved, and often when alcohol is part of the curriculum. Sports that guys like to play while downing a few brews are fishing, golfing, softball, and bowling. You can also find a lot of guys biking, running road races, skiing, surfing, snowboarding, jet skiing, boating, playing tennis, squash, or table tennis. And, you will always find guys working out in the gym, and I’m sure you know guys love to spot fit women in the gym. Sure, you’ll meet guys in yoga class, but there are more guys at the gym and this is about fishing where the most fish are.
4. Near the water – This is another great place to meet guys. Guys love boats, boat shows, surfing, jet skis, fishing, or simply relaxing at the beach or by a lake. And, being outdoors on a nice day seems to loosen people up. You’ll find lots of guys sitting at outdoor cafes enjoying the view with a refreshing beverage in hand.
5. Cars, trucks, motorcycles, and planes – Most guys love vehicles. They like to fix them, polish them, ride them, and talk about them. So, if you’re a woman who loves her wheels, there are lots of places to meet men including car shows, car or dirt bike tracks and races, riding motorcycles, and at auto repair stores. Of course you’re not going to hang out at a parts store unless you need something for your car. The point is dudes like their wheels.
6. Anywhere food is served – Make no mistake, guys love chowing down. The old adage about the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach still rings true. So with that in mind, keep your peepers open for hungry guys anywhere and everywhere food is served. A steak house is a good place to start. Most guys love meat. Personally, I gave up eating animal flesh eight years ago and have never felt better, but my ears still perk up when I hear that old familiar sizzle of a juicy steak hitting a fired up grill. Guys also like Mexican, Italian, ethnic foods, seafood, and foods they can pick up in their hands. Guys love breakfast, but not so much brunch, but that’s for another column.
7. Traveling – Happening guys are often on the go. That makes airport lounges, airplanes, hotel bars, ferries, and shared car services prime locations for meeting men. And when a guy is in transit, if he’s not on the phone or buried in his iPad or a book, guys are savoring their escape from being chained to their desks. I’ve met lots of women traveling, and have found that women on the go are empowered, aggressive, and usually up for fun. Ladies, it’s time to cash in those frequent flyer miles. You can easily meet quality men on a subway or a bus if you keep an open mind and are opportunistic about these means of transportation. We all have to get to work, right?
8. Tech Stores and conferences – There are so many guys into tech that you can have your pick at any tech or digital conference, store, or class. And guys love show off their technical chops to ladies. This should be easy pickings, especially if you go for the “nerds” who seem to be taking over the world.
9. Work – Despite all the warnings, work might be the very best place to meet guys. It’s also a great environment to see men in action. You can tell if they’re arrogant, power tripping, or a Guys’ Guys by how they behave and treat their colleagues. The only caution is when dating your boss or a guy who reports to you. Otherwise, all bets are off if you use your head and can handle the potential adversity that comes with having a relationship in a working environment. Your best move might be to pick a guy who works for a vendor or a company you do business with, especially if you can keep your romance separated from your working relationship.
10. Anywhere – The bottom line is men are all over the place and every single dude I know is open to meeting interesting women. I’ve only scratched the surface here, but I think you get the picture. Making new connections with men is a matter of confidence, demonstrating your sense of fun and adventure, and a desire to play the game of love. Good luck. I hope you win.
This week’s ”Guy’s Guys of the Week” are all the wonderful single women in New York City. My hometown is bursting with the smartest, hardest working, super capable, beautiful, and stylish women in the world. I empathize with their plight to meet men who are worthy of their talents.