AGING IS A CHOICE Part 31 – Live Alone and Thrive
by Robert Manni
Did you know that almost one out of three Americans over the age of 65 live alone? That means over 16 million older folks live by themselves. Of all seniors, nearly 50% of women and 20% of men are single. And as the Baby Boomers get older, the aging population will increase substantially. That means many more seniors will be living alone who at some point will need help dealing with illness, loneliness, and perhaps a lack of purpose.
For as many seniors dismayed by the challenges brought on by age and solitude, there are just as many who welcome and enjoy their newfound independence. What can make such a difference in outlook?
I believe certain practices promote our physical, mental, and spiritual health. And these practices help us thrive in our golden years.
Here are a few ideas to make the most of our latter independence.
A Glass half-full
You’ve lived a life filled with ups and downs. Now you’re living alone, whether by choice or due to unintended circumstances. It doesn’t matter. You’re a survivor and could have another third of your life ahead of you. Be thankful for who you are, what you have, and for each new day. At this stage of the game the possibilities may not be endless, but there can be quality years and good times ahead filled with health, friends, and fond memories.
How you perceive life is ultimately up to you. Whether you view your glass half-empty or half-full is a choice. Depending on your circumstances, you could be freer now than you’ve ever been to make your own happiness. You could write a book, take a trip, play more pickleball, or simply chill out with your kids and grandkids. Living with gratitude and noticing the little things are part of what makes life so good.
Connections
We are social beings. Relationships and new connections greatly increase our quality of life. It’s all too easy to stay home and never leave. We can order food, read books, participate on social media, watch movies, text friends and face-time family. That’s all good, but is this a healthy way to live your senior years? You could argue staying home keeps you safe and out of danger, but nothing beats real contact with others. These connections reduce feelings of loneliness, enhances mental and emotional well-being, promotes a sense of purpose, and increases longevity.
So next time you text or Zoom friends and family who live nearby, invite them for coffee, lunch, or to watch the game. And when you meet, don’t forget to hug, shake hands, or whatever it is you do to make that human connection.
Get Moving
Health is wealth. And our health is greatly impacted by our level of activity. Even light exercise reduces our risk of chronic disease, maintains stronger bones, enhances mood, improves cognition, raises self-image, and relieves stress. Something as simple as taking a daily walk brings lots of benefits. So, find an activity that you can do and get moving. You’ll be glad you did.
Beginners mind
Another aspect of staying active is challenging ourselves mentally. Approaching everything with a learner’s mind means no matter what we do, there is always something to be gained. We pay attention, stay present, and turn-off our autopilot. This keeps our minds alert and sharp.
Challenge yourself to learn something new every day. This can be done from the comfort of your home or attending classes or meet-ups in person. There is no end to discovering new ideas, topics, and interests. But it requires one thing. You must decide to do it. So, choose something that inspires you and get started.
Help Others
Having a purpose in life creates meaning for what we do every day. Sometimes, solitude and loss can leave us wondering why we are here. It’s during times like this, helping others will give us meaning and purpose. Think back on all the people who helped you along the way and the causes that have inspired you. There are myriad charities and organizations who will welcome the expertise of people like yourself. And you’ll be helping to improve the world, and yourself. Charity and giving are also great ways to interact with others, learn new skills, and stay active.
Living alone in your senior years can either be freeing or feel like prison. It depends on how you see your situation and how you shape it to your benefit. This is your life and you’ve still got a lot of living to do, so focus on engaging in the things that bring you the most joy. And remember, aging is a choice.
